As I’ve grown older, it became at first difficult and now impossible to save myself from abstractions. I spend a lot of my private thought searching for truths as a point of fixity to grasp what the fuck is going on and often coming up short. Because there is so much that is so hard to truly prove, even to myself, much less others.

But in speaking to others, it appears many don’t think too much of the abstractions. Everyone is always so sure. And not only sure but assuming all others must have the precise philosophy with no coaching whatsoever. Many don’t even like to be questioned. Perhaps it is out of desperation? We look at our world and Universe and to keep from screaming or going crazy at it all we instead just put it into as many straight lines, squares and rectangle as we can? Good and evil. Right and wrong. Just and unjust. Don’t these only work in microcosms and, if the entire abstraction of existence is considered, aren’t none of them really correctly applied.

And really, someone’s microcosm is really someone else’s macrocosm anyway. Because even time and space is abstract. They both theoretically go on forever so how do you arrive at any point in either and say this IS this.

Infinite years and infinite miles and here we are all so certain of ourselves. Here on Earth, our morality should be the most abstract of all but it isn’t. We are judged on moments not lifespans, hypocrisies not complexities, results not intentions.

But it is hard. Impossible even. To take it all in.

Humanity would never have advanced if the ape sat there contemplating every possible outcome and acting on none.

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