‘No Brainer’

Posted on December 6, 2010December 6, 2010 by Varg

It seems weird but I now have a favorite penalty of all time…

Saints draw Bengals offsides

And in the best name fore a “play” since Ambush, Heath Evans talks about “No Brainer Freeze.”

Andrew Das from the Old Gray Lady describes Brees thespian chops…

the Saints called timeout, then huddled up and went through an elaborate 20 seconds of play-acting as Brees looked agitated in the backfield, shouting out orders and formations and then settling under center to bark out the signals.

That story also has a great hedline: “Drew Brees Suckers a Bengal” Sounds like a children’s novel.

3 thoughts on “‘No Brainer’”

liprap says:

December 6, 2010 at 7:47 pm

A friend I was watching the game with thought it was a “dishonest” way to play. Hey, it’s part of the game. And it’s fun to read about it afterwards, obviously… 😉
Varg says:

December 7, 2010 at 9:07 am

Like the onside kick after halftime at the Super Bowl is dishonest too. My friend Randy from Michigan new they were trying to get them to jump offsides over here in Algiers. The D-Line HAD to have known it in Cincy. They did it anyway.
rickacrossdariver says:

December 7, 2010 at 10:58 pm

it’s like the best poker game you ever played with your boys in your life.

your all in for a huge ten or twenty dollor pot after a night of drinking and talking shit.

you’ve been on the edge of winning all night and the stakes went back and forth.

you bluff the last hand of the night and your boys buy into it and you win the hand,the pot , and the game.

you cant pay the rent on that bullshit but it’s still a hoot to win the game.

if we pass atlanta in the nfc souf that play will be a huge part of the mythology.

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Rejoice!

I say that a lot. I sign many pieces with it. I do this because I believe our lives are a true happenstance. A brilliant occurence from nothingness. We are so rare. We are so unlikely. And simply being born isn’t enough. From there we must survive, endure. So each morning, after our Sun departs and is reborn again. Please, for the sake of your ancestors and the Universe in general, hoist that cup of joe up and say, “Rejoice.”

Ours is a soulful existence. No matter how many McMansions, polyester fabrics, auto-tunes, modified foods and social networks we surround ourselves with, we are all still native, passionate beings made of ancient matter. We are organic and we have soul.

Wood also has a warm, soulful quality. Wood has a memory. It retains smells, traumas, events. It even has a calendar. This is why I have chosen it as my medium, for its old soul. I like to think the wood in my work is in its third incarnation. First a tree, then a home and now art. If you have a room that needs a little soul, get a piece. A room can never have enough soul.

My inspiration and subject matter comes from many sources, among them: Humanism, old ballads, trickster tales, flora and fauna, science, myths and folklore, stringed instruments, brass bands, amber spirits, lady vocalists, general relativity and quantum mechanics. Some of my pieces are there just to make a short, simple statement about what’s important in life. Some are more diffuse and abstract in meaning. A personal drama, an enduring line from a poem or novel, a poignant song lyric, the legacy of an important person, a fleeting thought … these are the subjects of my art.

I use hearts often because they are a very abstract way of depicting the human soul without also employing the very subjective human form. The symbolic heart is an apt representation for a person’s experience and essence. A body can immediatly conjure happiness, sorrow, youth, age, anger, bliss. These emotions can get in the way. Sometimes it’s simply about the experience.

I am the son of a sailor and a social worker, the grandson of a gypsy, a dancer and a nurse. I spent my youth moving from port city to port city, watching a lot of road go by and reading World Book Encyclopedia. After my parents settled down on the Gulf Coast, I was a miscreant youth, destroying cars and taking the wrongs things too seriously and the right things not serious enough. Eventually I began replacing my imagination with experience.

I will use any salvaged wood but prefer swamp cypress and longleaf heartwood pine.

I despise waste. Particularly the waste of organic matter. Trees are magnificent. They were here before we arrived and they’ll be around after we are gone. I’m making an effort to save as much wood as possible. Creating art is fun too. But beyond communicating with folks, but beyond making money ad providing for myself, beyond rescuing flooded parts, beyond reveling in the ethereal aroma of heartpine that hasn’t seen the light of day in 400 years, beyond all that, I am trying to make a simple comment on waste.