Martin first noticed her in Admissions. Her hat was unavoidable. White knit and droopy with her fair hair hanging out the end in tiny little curls. Essentially, she was just another pretty girl. The college was full of them. But the hat made this one distinct, distinct enough to notice twice.

He picked up next semester’s schedule and began to walk out. As he did, he heard her asking the questions a new student would ask, “How much is a parking permit?” “Where is the A building?” and “Are there any other bookstores around?” and then, as if to confirm his assumption, she told the agent, “I just moved here from Virginia three days ago.” Martin thought she was cute and nothing more as he walked out of Admissions.

Walking home down B street, Martin’s head was filled with thoughts of that day’s literature classes, how he was going to string a 15-second thought into a ten-page paper, how lucky he was to be carrying heavy literature books and looking forward to six more years of academic literature. Swimming in these thoughts, Martin nearly missed the girl with the white knit hat emerge from between two parallel parked cars and begin walking in front of him with her admissions forms and next semester’s schedule in her hands.

Out here in the daylight, away from the fluorescent light of Admissions, Martin was able catch a glimpse of her frame and noticed just how tiny she was, tiny enough to be considered “fragile” or “delicate.” He preferred delicate.
As a shameless girl watcher, (and nothing more.) Martin paced myself so that he would stay behind her until she found her car or apartment.

They approached the next intersection and Martin thought, “This will be the end of my silent admiration.” He had to walk two blocks over and then three blocks up to get home and assumed that the delicate hat girl’s course would take her out of his path. But she stayed on a steady course right in front of him as they walked single-file away from the college and into the streets of San Diego.

Though he enjoyed his view, Martin did not want to appear as if he was following the delicate hat girl. So he jaywalked across the street and resumed his thoughts of American and English Literature. The girl didn’t notice him and he was glad.
As the Deux Ex Machina would have it, Martin caught a “DON’T WALK” at the next corner and the delicate hat girl crossed the street at the curb in front of him. When his “DON’T WALK” turned into a “WALK,” he found myself placed right behind the delicate hat girl once again. She still didn’t seem to notice.

What made Martin uncomfortable about this situation was the fact that he only crossed the street so he wouldn’t appear to be following the delicate hat girl. What if she noticed him in Admissions and now thought he had followed her from there? Martin knew he was harmless but did she? What were the chances that they would end up on the same path three blocks away from the school?

Then again, perhaps she hadn’t even noticed him at all.

To further complicate things, Martin had to cross the street again to get to his house. He only crossed it in the first place to get out from behind the girl. He had hoped by now she would have climbed into a car and driven away but apparently, she was a walker. If she did know he was back here, it would look pretty suspicious if he crossed a street just to cross back the next block.

Martin was 15 feet behind her when they caught a “WALK” at the next intersection and made their way across the street and at this point Martin realized that they were both headed for the freeway overpass at the next block. The street Martin legitimately needed to use to get to his house was directly in front of this overpass so he would not need to walk under it. However, the delicate hate girl appeared as if she was going to be crossing under the overpass.
And Martin was uncomfortable with this.

Martin had walked under the overpass a number of times, On more than one occasion, he was confronted by the lunatics who dwelled there. As little as two months ago, an unknown purpetrator beneath the bridge killed a few derelicts and was never caught. Frequently, Martin noticed sleeping bums crying out for past lives and insulting him as he walked by. Between the north and south lanes of the freeway was a grassy area with a few bushes that served as a warren for the bums and street people that sheltered there. Martin could sometimes see their limbs hanging out from the shrubs or hear them yelling at each other as he walked by on his way to the store or to a friend’s house.

Small, clear, plastic bags littered the ground and abandoned shopping carts partially blocked the sidewalk. It was no place for the delicate hat girl.

Martin certainly meant this girl no harm. He was actually feeling protective of her. The way unknown men are sometimes protective over unknown girls. It was a primitive emotion that was certainly not blunted by the fact that this girl was dressed in all white with a funny knit hat and fair hair and skin. She had no idea where she was going or what lay under the freeway. She was obviously new in town and, wherever she was headed, did not realize or comprehend the fact that lunatics lived in her direct path.

The situation unfolding in front of Martin left him with a difficult decision. Should he continue to follow the delicate hat girl under the overpass? If she truly thought he had followed her all the way from Admissions, wouldn’t it absolutely terrify her to be stuck with a suspicious man underneath an overpass? A man who had followed her out of the college and four blocks down the street?

Martin also thought, if she had not yet noticed him, she might need his assistance under the overpass if she encountered the lunatics there. Dangerous men are more likely to attack a girl if she is alone. Martin’s presence may ward off an attempted rape.

However, in the delicate hat girl’s mind, Martin might be the lunatic, the lunatic who followed her under this overpass to overpower her and have his way with delicate body. Martin was torn between terrifying the delicate hat girl by following her under the overpass or leaving her alone and letting fate decide.

As they arrived at the intersection before the overpass, Martin forced himself to make a decision and came to the conclusion that he would follow her under the overpass for her own good. There was till a chance that she had never noticed him in admissions, never noticed him following her and would not notice him as they made their way across the bridge. Martin felt it was his duty to watch this delicate hat girl and see to it that she emerges from the bottom of the overpass safely.
At the last second however, as thoughts of Emily Dickinson raced through his head, Martin gave in to the notion that the girl would be terrified to have a man follow her out of a school and under a dark overpass. He considered his thoughts of protection to be selfish and sexist. In fear of terrifying her, he decided to let the delicate hat girl confront her own fate under the overpass and walked his own way home.